"Am I there yet?"

I'm on the road to better days. How long is this going to take?

I hate hearing that..."are we there yet?" "NO!" "We just left 10 minutes ago!!" I feel like I'm the one in the backseat yelling "well, am I there yet?" "What's taking so long?" I'm supposed to be letting God be the driver of my life- but I seem to want to be the backseat driver. What the heck is taking so long God? Okay, the divorce is over...now what? I want to have that life I wanted- but now as I type that I'm not sure what it is?

During the divorce process, I went to counseling and found it very helpful to talk one on one with someone. I sought out a divorce support group. I found something similiar at Heartland church. I went for 14 weeks and found it beneficial. However, when you're divorced you find yourself in a very lonely position- especically when all you have is married friends. Don't get me wrong, my married friends have helped me tremendously- but I'm looking for friendships that have endured the same sorrows- that can relate. I don't want my married friends to relate! I want them to stay married!!! So I have continued to look for support groups. Well, one started tonight at a church in Rockford- so I went (by the way- one should not have to drive 30 miles to get support in this way-I may have to do something about that!) I was hesistant in going because I've been through it already, I really don't need much more information about divorce, I have a few questions but really I'm on the road to recovery- I'm there! Well, my bubble was burst! They were saying that it may take up to 4-5 years to recover from a divorce. Are you flippin kidding me? Dude, I've been done with this for 4 months now- I should be OKAY! I should be able to move on and find that next relationship because I don't want to be a lonely spinster (and old). Well, as one of the leaders said- "oh this is going to be fun" alluding to the fact that I think all is well and done. He says I'm heading in the right direction, but it's too soon to say that I am fully recovered. DANG IT!

So what's the hold up? I know I know, God has His own timing and ours is null and void. I don't want to be someone that gets it wrong a second time because I wasn't ready. It's hard now that I'm single to not have your radar on for any potential cute available guys- Turn the radar off- God will provide the right person to compliment me - not to complete me.

I'm all about roads, paths, journeys= I guess I need to just sit back and enjoy the ride.